This post is now available in the ‘Life with an Autistic Son’ ebook available to download from Amazon.
Ah, this is so lovely, has brought a tear to my eye! She’s lucky to have you appreciate her too… you do show it often, don’t you?! 😉
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That’s a lovely post. Happy birthday to her 🙂
Happy birthday — quite a lovely tribute. Are you sure you didn’t mean to say she’s turning 39? or 29?
Your wife is very lucky to have such a thoughtful and caring spouse. Happy birthday to her!
So very beautifully said, it made me smile and thank God there are people like you both out there! Happy Birthday, B’s Mom!! God Bless you all!!
hugs from someone in a similar ‘place’ in life…!
What a beautiful post. And you know what I’ve found? After the dragging thirties of getting to grips with your’s child’s issues, you hit your stride in your mid 40s – so something to look forward to! Happy birthday to your wife! Tania
B’s Mum says: Thanks everyone. 24 hours into 40 and OK so far! I hope things improve for our family in the next few years with B, as the past few years have been very difficult. My husband has written a lovely post, and it was a surprise to me. I think i will print it off and keep it somewhere, as most of the time we are muddling through with the kids with very little time for kind words and loving gestures. It’s so easy for your relationship as a couple to be put under stress when you have kids, but especially when your child has SN and is as demanding as B is. Its hard to remember that we once just had each other and were not just ‘mom and dad’.
Happy belated birthday wishes. I have found with my oldest that it does get easier. I am glad you both have found someone very special.
You put into words everything I feel about being a mum to my long awaited adopted son. It’s tough but with a good man at your side it’s a little easier. Your wife is a lucky lady to have such a thoughtful caring chap at hers. 🙂
I wish that my husband had just a small piece of how you are…
He doesn’t understand where and how I stands with my autistic son.
He’s never even begun to try to understand why I’m doing what I’m doing for my autistic son.
Because my husband can’t be with my son as much as I do (basically 24/7 without any help),I understand why and how my husband is lack of experiences and knowledge how to deal with and teach my son day to day routine. So I’ve been trying to share,tell,ask and even beg sometimes to my husband to listen to me when I do. Explaining what I do how I do why I do these things for/to my difficult son and so on, but he just never seems to understand.He also doesn’t understand what’s behind what I do and why I do. He just pushes “his way”,which doesn’t work with my son’s characteristics and always end up wrong way for my son or destroys all what I’ve been putting together taking years and years with my son. And at the end, he thinks that’s my fault…
Well, I’ll put my husband’s attitude toward me to the side and forget about it.It’s OK,I’m an adult and I’ll manage it for myself somehow, but when it comes to something directly effect my son (learning,training,teaching,leading,guiding…),I just can’t put it away. I have to stand up for my son.
When my husband treats my son and/or acts toward my son like my son is just another little trouble maker and need to be CORRECTED his way,I have a HUGE problem.I think,my husband doesn’t have courage to accept our son as autistic special need child yet after all.As long as my husband doesn’t break through his own mind and feeling to accept his son as autistic special need,I don’t think he’ll never UNDERSTAND his son and his wife(me).
Thanks for your wonderful writing,always reading with appreciation for your ability to express our common feeling as an Autistic parent.
Thank you for sharing this. I think you share my wife’s quality of selflessness and committment to her child against the odds. I hope things work out for you. Can I ask, have you posted on the special needs forum of Mumsnet? The community of support available there is fantastic. Take care x
Answer to your question. No, I haven’t posted any on Mumsnet.
I’ll check it out.
Take care : )
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