This post is now available in the ‘Life with an Autistic Son’ ebook available to download from Amazon.
Hi, please don’t be angry with yourself, you’re doing the best you can for your family. It is perfectly normal to feel anger in this situation I think though, and the best thing to do is to get it out somehow. While you’re trying, please don’t tell your wife she needs to see a doc about her mental illness…!!! (can you tell that one didn’t go down so well here…?!) having said that, I do think it is worth seeing a doc to see if any counselling is available… I have a hunch lots of special needs parents would benefit from it…
It is normal to be angry in the circumstances and I fully understand, but at least your sons school are trying to help, even if they do get it wrong sometimes.
My sons school have systematically destroyed him over the last 2 years due to their lack of understanding. After 15 months of A levels, school suddenly realised that C has a problem with abstract concepts, planning for coursework/revision, arguing a point etc despite the fact that he has a statement and i have told them of potential difficulties every week since year 7.
The result has been that 2 teachers did not know how to differentiate his work so they kicked him off the courses and he hasn’t been to school since February….instead it has been up to me to home teach him with no support from school!
However bad things are with schools now, I do wish that we were starting the education journey rather than finishing it – I can see a lot of improvements have been made since we started school and I wonder how different C’s future would be looking if we had had the help that is around now.
Dear Dad of B,
your posts are such a Godsend for me, with my own child, nearly 8 (next friday is her birthday..!) who is as yet undiagnosed, but has a statement of SEN and is so much like B, that I feel like fighting the world to get her all the help due to her… she is bright, chirpy and chatty, but has difficulties like ecohalia, Morots skills, language, social comm. etc… all i want to say is, you’re not alone..the thought and prayers of countless parents like myself are with you…
go for it! Your Dear son is one amazing kid, and lucky to have you both as parents..
Right, I’ve calmed down now. I’m always hesitant about posting rants like the one above, but usually do with the attitude that, if I’m feeling it, others might be too.
I have good news following the meeting. School pretty much relented to everything we asked. B will be in pants full time from now on and if his water intake doesn’t increase, juice will be allowed. Result! It took the health care professional to say it before they would listen, but perhaps our opinions as parents will be heard more clearly next time.
It’s worth repeating that school have, in most ways, been very supportive of my son.
Thanks to everyone who has read, commented and emailed me recently.
Here’s to a pleasant, calm weekend!
Pingback: The Highs and Lows of a Year in Mainstream School (Part One) | Life with an Autistic Son
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